Larry Page Becomes World's #2 Richest: Net Worth, Larry Ellison, and the Reality Check
Generated Title: Larry Page's New Throne: Who Actually Cares?
So, Larry Page is richer than Larry Ellison now. Big freakin' deal. Like anyone outside of Silicon Valley give a damn about another billionaire pissing contest. The headlines are all "Larry Page becomes second richest person in the world!" Okay, and? Are my student loans magically disappearing? Is rent suddenly affordable? Didn't think so.
Shares of Alphabet, Google's parent company, are up like 70% this year, we're told. All thanks to AI, offcourse. Because apparently, the only thing that matters these days is how fast we can automate ourselves out of a job. Google's "Gemini 3" is supposedly the new hotness, beating out ChatGPT. Salesforce CEO Marc Benioff is even cheerleading from the sidelines, tweeting about it. Free advertising from a rival. You can't make this stuff up. Or, actually, you can, because it's probably all just marketing hype anyway.
The Illusion of Innovation
This whole thing is built on the illusion of innovation. "AI momentum," they call it. But what's it actually doing for regular people? Is it curing diseases? Solving climate change? Nah. It's making rich people richer by automating call centers and writing slightly-less-terrible marketing copy. And let's be real, it's probably spying on us even more effectively than before.
And the speed at which Larry Page's net worth has exploded is just obscene. From $50.9 billion in 2020 to $272 billion now? That's not innovation; that's wealth hoarding on a scale that would make Scrooge McDuck blush. Larry Page Passes Larry Ellison Becoming World’s Second-Richest
Meta (aka Facebook) is supposedly in talks to use Google's AI chips. Of course they are. The two biggest data-sucking, privacy-invading companies on the planet teaming up to become even more powerful. What could possibly go wrong?
The Real World vs. Billionaire Fantasies
Meanwhile, back in the real world, people are struggling to afford groceries. But hey, at least Larry Page can buy another private island, right? I mean, who is Larry Page anyway? Oh right, one half of the Sergey Brin and Larry Page duo that started Google. The company that now knows more about you than your own mother does.
And let's not forget that Page stepped down as Google CEO back in 2019. So, he's not even running the show anymore, just raking in the dough while other people do the actual work. Nice gig if you can get it.
It's all just a giant game of Monopoly for billionaires. They pass "Go," they collect $200 billion, and the rest of us get stuck paying inflated rent on Baltic Avenue. And they expect us to believe this nonsense, and honestly...
Wait, what was I even talking about? Oh yeah, Larry Page's net worth. Who cares? It's a meaningless number in a world where actual human beings are suffering. I mean, good for him? I guess? But forgive me if I don't exactly break out the champagne.
So, What's the Point of All This?
It's not about innovation, or technology, or even Google's stock price. It's about the grotesque inequality that defines our era. It's about a system that rewards a tiny handful of people with unimaginable wealth while leaving the rest of us to fight over the scraps. And frankly, I'm sick of it. Ain't nobody got time for that.